Tuesday, July 16, 2019 14:30

Maybe

She looks nice. She looks like she’d be an interesting person, that i’d find her interesting. Maybe she’s an artist, or musician. A creative type with flare and an edge the other girls simply don’t have. Maybe she’s just like me. Maybe she’s lonely too. Maybe she’s having the exact same thoughts about me right now. Maybe I have the courage to talk to her, and through some measure of miracle she talks back, and it’s not awkward and she likes me. Maybe we have an inexplicable spark and everything just feels right. Maybe we take the bus together and the conversation flows and the journey doesn’t end too soon. Maybe I ask to see her again, and she blushes and she says “Yes!”. Maybe it’s beautiful and straight away I realize she’s what I’ve been looking for for so long. Maybe we hold hands in public and feel wrong when our fingers aren’t intertwined. Maybe I can stand the thought of shopping, but only with her. Maybe we intend to start slow, but things are so damn perfect we can’t help but take it quick.

Maybe we live together and each day is like an adventure all over again and every mundane task seems so fresh and full of life. Maybe she cooks for me and content simply with the look on my face as a compliment. Maybe she waits for me at home and doesn’t get mad when I don’t call…

Maybe…

Maybe I love her…

Maybe we fall in love, and nothing has ever felt so right. Maybe she can hold me on the dark days, and when i feel to scared to go on she can tell me that it’s all OK, and I believe her. Maybe I can do the same for her… Maybe I’m her saviour and she needs me more than anything else… Maybe she can’t live without me… Maybe its perfect… Maybe she makes me feel “home” and safe… Maybe her smile is enough to make all the pain go away…

Maybe she’s everything…

…just not for me. Maybe she’s someone else’s. Maybe she tells someone else that it’s all OK. Maybe she loves someone else, cooks for someone else and holds someone else’s hand. Maybe I don’t have the courage to talk to her and she gets on the bus and forever goes away to live this other fantastic life. Maybe she can never be mine. Maybe I can’t live with that.

With all the courage in this world gathered in my eyes, I look at you.

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